The Color Purple:

Well youngest and her friend decided to color my daugthers hair tonight. I, trying to be the helpful mom, helped rinse the color purple dye out of her hair.... resulting in a purple haired daughter and a mother with a purple hand. Spent the last 15 minutes trying to wash the purple off my hand... I am facilitating a meeting and doing the presentation tomorrow. I figure as long as I don't raise my hand I'll be okay... or I could just wear purple and try to blend in...

If she lets me post a picture I will.... she is quite excited - I am trying to keep in mind that if this is the worse she does, we are doing good.

Thankful that I don't hate the color purple...

Complaining

"Do everything without complaining or arguing..." Philippians 2:14

Easier said than done. I read the scripture on the way to church on Sunday and it made me pause. How much complaining do I do everyday? I tried to pay attention to how I did over the day and yep there was definitely some complaining. I was set up though, the weather was cloudy and cold and rainy, as a true Saskatchewanian how could I not at least complain about the weather? Seriously though, it is amazing at how much complaining I probably do.

This morning I was in a meeting and the VP was there talking about some things that were happening. She talked about this one situation where someone was suggesting that we address something in one particular way - she stated we could have said "Duh where have you been the last 15 years when we suggested this and have been trying to get the government to agree!" but instead she said it was an opportunity to say "Great idea, here all the things that we have been working on in regards to that." I thought, what a great way to deal with it and to be positive instead of negative. Is that an example of "doing everything without complaining or arguing."?

Anyway, food for thought.

Had a fun Sunday school class - only 2 boys showed up. I had a skit prepared where I needed at least 6 or more. We all played multi parts. It was fun though sitting at the table with the two of them talking about how to be responsible. They had great ideas for such young lads. Don't litter, help my parents when they are sick, brush my teeth, etc. I had prepare the craft project for 12 so we had a "few" extra. We decided to hand them out to the younger class. Niles at first said he didn't want to hand them out so I said that's okay I can do it, then as I am walking out of the room he runs up behind me - "No, I'll do it." he says. My example of responsible, sharing.

I am thankful for cooler weather for my walking home, I am thankful my daughter who did some house cleaning when she was home sick, I am thankful she has a drivers license, I am thankful my hubby puts up with my tossing and turning at night, I am thankful for friends who invite us out for lunch, I am thankful for a boss that is easy to work for, I am thankful for my secretary who agreed with my suggestions for changes to the newsletter, I am thankful for a loving God that continues to put up with me and is always faithful, I am thankful for the opportunity to get to know the young boys at church, I am thankful for pot lucks, I am just so thankful for all that the good Lord has blessed me with and I need to remember that the next time I feel like complaining!

Dr. Horrible interrupts the Emmy's




I only posted this so I can watch it whenever I want. I'm afraid Kristie has forced me to become a Dr. Horrible fan... the influence children have on their parents! I guess I can't complain - I influenced her into becoming a Josh Groban fan...

"If we are going to worship in Spirit, we must develop a spirit of worship" - Michael Catt


Well our summer was good, nothing overly exciting but it did end with a bang!


Kristie moved to Regina. I went in her car with her on moving day and she asked me if I was okay with this. Am I okay with my daugther moving away from home? I am sooooo okay with it!! Parents want their kids to be happy and I know that she will be happy there. I am thankful for all the friends that she has met in the last few years that bring joy and laughter to her life, I am thankful that she met a really good friend, I am thankful for the families that have enveloped her into their family and love her as one of their own. I am thankful for Roy who got her a job this summer that set her up for her job in Regina. I am thankful for Ruth who took Kristie to her office one Saturday to let her use the photocopier and then decided on the spur of the moment to go online to check out jobs. Then insisted that Kristie fax off her resume to a job posted (which is the job she got). I am thankful for Tammy and Kirk who let her store her furniture and stuff in their garage until she could move into her place. I am thankful for the Vance's who let her crash at their place for her a few days. I am thankful for the way that God continues to love her and be with her.


Sarah ended the summer with getting her driver's license on the first try. I haven't seen much of my car since then but I wanted her to have some freedom before school starts. She has a heavy class schedule this semester - 3 sciences and a math. The same week, she got a phone call from a restaurant that she had dropped a resume off a few months ago, asking if she would like to come in for an interview. A couple days later she has a job. Seems to be an understanding place when it comes to hours of work which I'm thankful for. Sarah has been in such good spirits this week - it is great to see her so happy. Maybe with the job and the heavy workload it will keep her too busy to get into any teenage mischief - or at least cut down on the amount! I am thankful that God continues to watch over her and has been helping her see the "big picture" on choices made. I am thankful she has a job so she can have spending money and save towards a laptop or car. I am thankful that when asked to work Sunday morning she said she couldn't - she goes to church. I am thankful for the opportunities this summer to get to know some of her friends a bit better. I am thankful for one friend that has cooked us suppers and has taught me that bright outrageous clothing options are really not that bad. I am thankful that this summer Sarah cooked most of the meals, moved the grass and helped around the house... almost felt like I had a maid.


Murray had a good summer tinkering with the boat, taking the girls out boating and driving around in his new truck. His shoulder is still giving him problems but he is perservering through it. I am thankful for the times he has spent with his daughters - driving with Sarah, suppers out with Kristie (chinese food). I am thankful for my renovated bedroom because he was bored on our summer holidays.


Myself - had a good summer at work, felt like I knew what I was doing, did a big meeting/presentation one day and I think it went really good. I felt really comfortable leading the conversations and presenting the information to everyone. Thanks Lord for the confidence you have given me. Plus I got a raise! I am thankful my ear has been good all summer, little troubles with it.


All in all things have been going really good in our house which is maybe why I feel so spiritually not well. I remember reading a passage in the bible (can't remember where) about when things are going good, peoples pride starts taking over and they don't lean on God as much. I was reading Jeremiah this morning on the way to chuch and a phrase caught my attention "stubborn heart". I think that describes my heart these days... too stubborn to take the time with God, too stubborn with what I want to do, think, feel. So the sermon today was very specific to me I think.


So I end this blog with one request to God from the song at church "Purify my heart, touch me with your cleansing fire..."

From my morning reading:

In Isaiah chapter 40:

"God doesn't come and go. God lasts.
He's Creator of all you can see or imagine.
He doesn't get tired out, doesn't pause to catch his breath.
And he knows everything, inside and out.
He energizes those who get tired,
gives fresh strength to dropouts.
For even youth people tire and drop out,
young folks in their prime stumble and fall.
But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.
They spread their wings and soar like eagles,
The run and don't get tired,
they walk and don't lag behind."

Isaiah 41:
"That's right. Because I, your God,
have a firm grip on you and I'm not letting go."

Isaiah 43:
"I've call your name. You're mine.
When you're in over your head, I'll be there with you,
When you're in rough waters, you will not go down
When you're between a rock and a hard place,
it won't be a dead end -
Because I am God, your personal God."

hmm...looks like it has been a couple of months since I last blog - the curse of Facebook and Twitter - takes you away from deep thoughts to one liners that sometimes say little about what is really happening into your or can say too much of what is happening.

So what can I blog about? Well I'm sitting here next to my sick daughter watching the tv series Moonlight, using (and being quite jealous) of her new laptop. We just got back from boating with the youngest and her friend. They were out tubing and having a blast. It's always great to see smiles on my kids face and watching them have a blast. Sarah seems happier these days so I'm thankful to the good Lord for answered prayers.

It's been great having the oldest home. The one thing that I have enjoyed is the freshness of a her faith. She talks about God anywhere and everywhere - we were at Indigo one day checking out the computer where you can look up books. Once we finished looking she typed "Jesus loves you" on the search field stating that the next person needed to know that. I enjoy again getting up and going to church on Sundays as now there is more than just me that wants to go to church. I enjoyed sharing the Upside Down Project with her. She has an ease about her about prayer - we were in the grocery store and I was in a bad mood - she told me I needed to stop and pray about it right there :-) I'll miss her when she returns to her new "home".

We bought a very nice patio set at a garage sale and so now I need to have people over for more bbq's. So if you're reading this and I haven't invited you over yet make sure I do!!

Well that's it for my deep thoughts LOL

I'm thankful for sunny days, my backyard, the boat, for daughters that snuggle with you on the couch watching movies, for summer holidays, good books and even the bad ones, haircuts, slurpee's (and daughters that go get them for you), cheeries, lazy days, and the fact I only have 4 more days of work and then I'm on holidays for 3 weeks. Life is good, God is good.

So I turned 50.

It’s been an interesting last year of the first half century of my life.

A year where I have cried, worried, being totally freaked and scared for my children, a year where I have been more proud, inspired and felt such great love for my children.

A year where at times I have felt so far away from God, where I have stumbled a lot in my walk with him but a year where I have felt most loved and protected by my God, a year where I know my friends and family have lifted my family up to the Lord in prayer. A year where I’ve been on my knees more thanking and praising the Lord for how he has answered my prayers, for his many blessings and a year where I’ve been on my knees begging for help and guidance and wisdom. A year where there has been four of us in the church pew on a Sunday, two whose hope is in Jesus.

This last year we have been the most financially secure than ever before thanks to my new job, a year where I’ve had more money to spend on those wants in one’s life but a year where I have wanted less of those things and have learned that family is more important. A year where I have been able to give back in thanks for the times that we’ve been giving to.

This last year I have felt the healthiest. A medical concerned has forced me to eat better, exercise more and feel better. It has forced me to deal with stress in a better way so that I feel happier and more content with where I am.

So now I look towards the future. Where I see a gentle and loving Lord who only wants the best for me and my family, and who I know is working on us all.

Should I start a "bucket list" yet? Someone asked if I was going to get a tattoo - nope. I did get my boating license so I'll start my list with driving a boat around the lake. Some of the other items on the list might be laugh more, love more, live more, hug my children more, spend more times with friends, more time with family, lift my face to the sun and soak in warmth, smell the flowers, smile at strangers, lend a hand where it's needed, be radical!

So here’s to the future – let the celebrations begin.

Daughters...

Last Monday day I watched my two daughters running up and down the street, with sparklers in their hands...giggling, laughing, just having fun being silly with each other. It was one of those moments that your heart wants to capture and never let go of.

Last Sunday I hugged and cried tears of joy with my oldest as she told me that she had decided to be baptised. I really don't have the words to describe that morning or the afternoon, which is why I haven't posted for the week. All I can say is it was another one of those moments that your heart wants to capture and never let go of.

Tonight the youngest made supper, put it on our plates and brought supper to us. As she was making supper she was talking about school and other stuff. I know that doesn't sound like a big deal but considering she spent the previous 2 days being mad at us and not really talking to me, it was a wonderful feeling. It reminded me that we as a family can go through the ups and down, be angry, be mad, be worried but underneath it all is our love for each other that God has enriched our family with. The love that holds us together through it all, and that is something that wams my heart.

I feel so blessed that Murray and I were given such beautiful daughters to raise and love and cherish. Irregardless of the ups and downs of parenthood I wouldn't have it any other way.

Pride and Taxes:

So begins that time of year when we start receiving in the mail our tax receipts for donations, RRSP's and T4 slips. I just received one today from an organization I've donated to over the year. I was surprised at the amount and I confess started feeling a little proudful of the total. Then I read my daily reading from Exodus (36):

"The men were eager to get started and engage in the work. They took from Moses all the offerings that the Israelites had brought for the work of constructing the Sanctuary. The people kept on bringing in their freewill offerings, morning after morning. All the artisans who were at work making everything involved in constructing the Sanctuary came, one after another, to Moses, saying "The people are bringing more than enough for doing this work that God has commanded us to do!" So Moses sent out orders through the camp. "Men! Women! No more offerings for the building of the Sanctuary!" The people were ordered to stop bringing offerings! There was plentry of material for all the work to be done. Enough and more than enough."

Not feeling so proudful now.

Thanks Lord for the reality check.

Otherthan that around here, life has been chugging along. We have had my husbands nephew in law from BC living with us for the month. He has been really easy going but a big eater so though we haven't had to adjust that much with him living with us, I have had to be more conscious of cooking bigger and more nutrious meals on a daily basis. My family has been appreciating that. My slow cooker hasn't been used so much since we bought it!

My youngest daughters school marks tanked big time and I'm hoping it was a wake up call to the importance of being more consistent with her studying. She was very disappointed in the marks and now has been following through with bringing her school work home everyday and going over it again. Which I am very thankful for. She also applied for a job and had her first interview. Doesn't think she got it but I think it was a good experience for her.

Oldest daughter learnt the lesson of choosing what she can and she can't afford. She needed new prescription for her glasses and thought about contacts and new frames. After a discussion about needs and wants, and what she and her parents could afford - she decided, on her own, to only get new lenses. My baby is growing up.

Thank you Lord for my children, my husband and opportunities to really think about what I believe in...oh, and for those all important humbling reality checks.

January thoughts...

Well I haven't blog for awhile - nothing to say or not motivated to write - probably the later I usually have something to say about something!

Okay insightful moment I had on the way from work office to a meeting at city hospital - walking along a path through a field to the bridge - it is a narrow bumpy path that fits about 1 person but eventually got me to the even wide bridge. Made me think of our walk with God - He never said it would be even, or straight just that he would be there with us and the end would be worth it. I had to concentrate on where I was placing my foot otherwise I could have easily slipped off the path into the deep snow - just like our walk with God - we have to concentrate to stay on the right "path", any distractions could easily lead to sliding off the path. I could see where people had stepped off the path or tried to make their own trail - you can try walking through life on your own but it would be slow slogging, tiring and you never know if the next step will sink you deeper but you can always work your way back to the path - it's always there waiting for you.

I was thankful for the path and thankful for my walk with the good Lord.

Work has been busy, gearing up for a lot of new projects I am involved with which is really stretching me skillwise and I'm loving it. I have to do a big presentation to the program managers on Monday - a little nervous but hoping I slow down and relax - last one I talked a little too fast! LOL

Favorite picture of the month is this one...

PS - the gift that my daughter bought me for Christmas was Dance Revolution for the WII. At first I talked to the tv alot because it's not very encouraging when you score an E or a D and I'm so white (I have no rhythm) - the family has laughed alot at me when I talk to the tv (okay sometimes it was yelling) "I'm 50 and overweight I think I'm doing pretty darn good!!!" Actually I didn't feel I was but the more I work at it the better it's getting. I did beat my daughters friend at one of the dances - talked her into doing it with me and she wasn't motivated to do anymore until I beat her and made a comment about being beaten by your friends 50 years old mom - both of them got back on and tried some more LOL I love the competitive spirit of my daughter.

Insomnia and Christmas:

Well another night of insomnia has me surfing the web. Came across this video...


Gotta admit - in my life, this video strikes a little to close for comfort...

Thanks for the reminder Lord on this quiet night...

Well we are getting closer and closer to Christmas and here I sit at the computer on a silent Saturday morning, everyone asleep but me – including the dog.

I am happy to say that I am looking forward to Christmas, for awhile there I thought it might not be one of our happier years but God has continued to work in our lives. I have been trying really hard when I imagine the future with all the possibilities to make sure I include a loving caring God in the future – who is working for our good. Seems to be working – thanks Lord.

Sarah even mentioned last night that she is excited and can not wait for Christmas. For awhile there we were all planning on sleeping in as she knew what she was getting (the store called and informed us her gift was ready for pickup – unfortunately she took the call and then asked me about it when my brain was frozen). But the hubby and Sarah went out shopping last night for my gift and she came home really excited about it. She mentioned that she really hoped I liked it, it was something she remembered me looking at and commenting I’d like. I told her that the fact she remembered something I had looked at was enough to make the gift special. Thank you Lord for a thoughtful child.

Sarah and me went to Regina a weekend or two ago, just the two of us. She even drove part of the way there and part of the way back and I slept. Which means I’m feeling pretty confident in her driving. She takes her drivers ed class again in February in hopes that she can take her driving test in March just after her birthday. We also heard a good sermon on Sunday. Kirk talked about presents/gifts at this time of year and then of course switched it up to talk about the gifts that God has given us. We all get the gift of salvation, the gift of grace, the gift of mercy but he encouraged us to open the other gifts under the tree. Some are the type that needs some assembly too – when he mentioned that I was thinking about my own gifts from God that required assembly – there are days I think I’ve lost a part or two!! Anyway, I found it to be a very thought provoking sermon. Thank you Lord for a good weekend.

As I was walking home one day I got a text from her saying she had a surprise for me. Turned out a package arrived in the mail. I told her I thought maybe the surprise might have been a clean house and supper on the table. Next day I came home to a clean house and the sidewalk shoveled. Thank you Lord for a daughter that knows how to act on a good hint once in awhile.

We got a call last night from my brother in law and mother in law. They were at a hotel in Vancouver, as she had to go see a specialist about her eye. Murray couldn’t believe how coherent and happy she sounded – what a change from last year this time. She ended up in the hospital about 2 months ago and her doctor finally was able to get her off this one medication she has been on for years and I mean years. We now all think that medication was causing the most problems with her health and mental state. Thank you Lord for putting her in the hospital so they could get her off the drug in a control, monitored place.

I’m now waiting for a call from my younger sister – who emailed me to say she was going to call this morning. Haven’t talked to her for awhile so I’m looking forward to seeing how things are going her way. Thank you Lord for technology that keeps families connected.

Nutcracker...

Kristie was in town this weekend - she even came home by 5:00 on Friday so we had lots of visiting time this weekend.

She came home to go to the ballet with me on Saturday night. The Moscow ballet co. was in to do the Nutcracker. We were really stoked for it but it fell short for us. We both sat through the first part trying to decide what to say to the other...

I think the stage was too small and that's what made the stage too busy but I don't think all the dancers were that great. There were moments of brilliance amidst alot of ... blah. Some of the dancers looked like they were not that into it.

Lots of children from the city were a part of this production so in that respect it was a great opportunity for them to be a part of a professional production. We did a lot of comparing between when she was a part of the Winnipeg Ballet Co Nutcracker when she was 10. We decided that was the best of the two and not just because she was a part of it either!! LOL

In the parking lot afterwards we took turns calming each other down when it came to the line ups and cars and the wait to get out. I'd get ticked off about some driver and she would tell me to chill and then she would comment on some driver and I'd tell her to calm down.

All in all though a great evening to visit with the daughter and a good start to the Christmas season...today I'm putting up the Christmas tree's...though I'm feeling very tired and should have a nap.

A weekend of pondering...

Part of a conversation between Mack and Jesus in the book "The Shack" that made me pause and think…

“You imagine. Such a powerful ability, the imagination! That power alone makes you so like us. But without wisdom, imagination is a cruel taskmaster.

Where do you spend most of your time in your mind, in your imagination, in the present, in the past, or in the future?

I do not dwell in the future you visualize or imagine. Mack, do you realize that your imagination of the future, which is almost always dictated by fear of some kind, rarely, if ever, pictures me there with you?

It is your desperate attempt to get some control over something you can’t. It is impossible for you to take power over the future because it isn’t even real, nor will it ever be real. You try and play God, imaging the evil that you fear becoming reality, and then you try and make plans and contingencies to avoid what you fear.”

Two things about this section that made me stop and think. The part about do I visualize God working in the situation I’m imagining (or fretting over, stressing about, etc.).

The other line was about our desperate attempt to get some control over something you can’t. I’ve had control issues all my life and this line kind of made me stop and shift my thinking.

There I am in a situation where I have no control over what may happen, I have no idea what may happen or decisions that someone else might make (except all the awful things that I have no problem imagining might happen). I need to truly believe that God is good, that He loves me, wants only good for me and that He will be an active part of that future. Then I need to let go and trust.

Easier said than done… but with God’s help I’m still working on it!!

Kristie was home this weekend, and proceeded to play on the WII. Sarah had a soccer tournament this weekend ended up with a toe injury on Saturday.



While watching the two of them box, I realized again just how different the two of them are and it shows even in their boxing styles!!



But even with their differences, there was still a lot of love between them which is always great to see.

Thank you Lord for my two beautiful daughters.

Praise the Lord, praise the Lord...

I have this song going through my head but I can't remember any words except those above (I think maybe the next line is "Let the angels rejoice, praise the Lord, praise the Lord)... but they are what I've been feeling since Thursday night. Don't ask me why it's personal but it's how I feel.

Update pictures of my beautiful children... here is Sarah on Halloween night, I actually don't mind this picture of me - Sarah took the picture several times trying to get my devil horns in the picture but she gave up trying after I said I like this picture.

Here is a picture of my other beautiful daughter on her trip to New Orleans - yeah she should be home late tonight - so fingers crossed she calls me tomorrow. She dyed her hair red!! It looks good.

Thanik you Lord for the people you place in our lives, for patience, for guidance, for love, for answering prayers.

Songs that speak to you and Tears:

Okay, I don't even like crying in front of people and walking down a public street with tears it's definetely not what I want to do...so I'm seriously considering changing the playlist on my ipod.

Though I've listened to this song a multitude of times, when I was listening to it today - someone's name came to mind and the song just hit me.

So, when you're listening to this song and you start thinking of someone - may I suggest you insert their name in the song and make it your prayer.

Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength. -- Charles H. Spurgeon

A good quote to remember.

I have a new book to read - “The Shack”. My niece was telling me about it on Friday night and offered to lend it to me to read. When I got home that night, I received a call from my oldest daughter. During our conversation she starts to tell me about this great book she has read and how I should read it…guess which book? Yep, “The Shack”. Read the prologue so far and looking forward to a hot bath tonight with this good book.

I noticed this week how I have passed on certain habits. Went out for lunch with my youngest daughter and then we went shopping. Hit a really good sale at her favorite store and ended up buying her a bunch of new clothes. 4 t-shirts and 3 bunny hugs for $60 (tax included) – you just can’t pass up those bargains! She was telling me that I should buy some clothes there too but I decided skulls and bones were not really my style … okay to be fair to Sarah none of the clothes she bought had skulls or bones on them. I just think that I’m too old to shop at that store. Anyway, back to the habits. When I buy something new, I usually wear it immediately the next day. Sarah has worn just about all the clothes we bought in the last 2 days.

Lord, I am thankful for good books, family that shares, conversations with daughters, rainy weather, hot baths, long distance phone calls, dishwashers, and a loving and caring God. Help me to not let my anxiety and worries for both my daughters empty today of its strength, help me to trust you and know that all will work out.

Being sick can remind you of important facts:

Ever since my last post I’m been sick – in the midst of the second go at having the flu.

I’m starting to wonder if it was God’s way of reminding me what a great kid I have. She has been awesome through my illnesses. It seems both nights when I was my sickiest – her dad was out of town or at a hockey game with no cell phone. She looked after me, brought me whatever I needed, checked up on me. The other night when she realized how sick I was and I wanted to go to the medi clinic to make sure it wasn’t something else – but we couldn’t get hold of the hubby – she just says “Well I’ll drive you, I’ve never driven at night but I’ll drive you.” So her, her 2 friends and me piled in the car and between her and her friends back seat driving she was able to merge across all the lanes on 8th and get me to the local medi clinic and back. She also spent the rest of the evening until her dad came home checking in on me, bringing me water, making sure I was okay through the vomiting episode, and whatever else I needed. She even got up this morning after her friends left, cleaned up the basement and did all the dishes without being asked. I love my daughter! Underneath her rebellion and trying to discover herself and what she believes – she is a great kid with a good and loving heart.

Funny driving story on the way back from the medi clinic - she had to make a left turn on a light. It was night and she hadn't done that before, trying to figure out how far the cars were and if she had time to turn or not - she kept saying "can I go can I go?" Her friends are saying - "oh just wait til the light turns yellow and then go, who cares if the person behind gets mad, he can suck it up." LOL

We caved yesterday and bought a WII. I was thinking it might be a good way of keeping my daughter and her friends at our house and in the living room instead of at someone else’s house when I have no idea what they are up to. Here's a pic of my daughter and her dad playing (note her new bangs!).

So far it has succeeded. Friends came over in the afternoon, they played all afternoon, all evening, and night. She had a great time, friends had fun and I didn’t need to worry about what was going on.

It so hard to be a parent somedays...to know what is the right thing to do is.

I had a conversation with my daughter last night. It started off on one serious conversation and overlapped into religion. She shared with me some things that people had said to her during church classes that she questioned or didn’t agree on. Now I don’t fault the person that said these things since my daughter didn’t challenge or question the person on these statements to get a better meaning of what that person really meant.

She said that someone had stated that if you believe in God your life will be rosy, and her comment on that was “I don’t believe that.” I told her I didn’t either, if life is rosy if you believe than why was I having this conversation with her in the first place, why did the last few years of my mom’s life be what they were, why did my sister end up getting divorced? But what really broke my heart was the underlying thought that she never spoke but I could sense was there – “If they told me that and it’s not true, what else are they telling me that’s not true.”

The other thought that broke my heart was that she never felt comfortable coming to me with these questions at the time. She must have felt it would have been a one sided conversation that didn’t include her questions or thoughts. I feel that I’ve failed her. My hope and prayer is since this conversation and my promise to her that she can come talk to me about anything and I promise to hear and not get upset, that maybe she will now.

Lord, please help me to be the parent that she needs. Help me to be calm and understanding…help me.

Everything at once:

Okay, so I decided to take a 5 day weekend (Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday) to try and resolve some health issues I've been having. Figured 5 days of getting as much sleep as I needed, trying to eat the foods I'm not allergic to and resting would help with the cold and the hives.
Thursday early early early morning wake up to discover I think I have something else wrong with me. Doctor confirms the next morning, puts me on drugs - my 5 day weekend is now a 6 day weekend.
Friday - things are settling down - no recent hives, sniffles still there and just a little pain. Spent a fun evening with friends.
Saturday feeling even better - slammed both hands into a drawer that I was trying to close that wouldn't - 2 cuts and a bruise later.
I'm a little worried about the rest of my holidays LOL

Besides that life is good. Lots of phone chats with Kristie, doing some spring cleaning, finishing off some books, made 3 dozen rhubarb muffins, going to see Steve Bell tomorrow night, playing on Facebook too much and learning my class scriptures in sign language - it's actually helping me memorize them and is fun.

Got this quote in the mail and really like it!

Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength.
-- Charles H. Spurgeon