October..."Love is an action, not a feeling. Love is a choice. In fact, Love is a commandment." Mack Timberlake

I love the fall simply for all the changing colors of the leaves, how pretty they look on the tree's, on the ground and in contrast to each other. All the different shades and sizes. Reminds me of God's brilliant and complex mind that has created such variety and beauty for us. I always feel so loved when I look at the tree's in the fall.

October will be a busy month for me. Work is getting busier and busier to the point I am finding it hard to find a day to take off but oh well, it will keep me out of mischief! A variety of activities happening at the home front as well.

October will be a month of change - I'm losing my wonderful boss (he is retiring at the end of the month), I will be welcoming a new boss (hopefully one I get along with), new windows in our kitchen/dining room and new paint on the walls! Oh and one last change I hope happens soon - going from being sick with this cold (all family members included) to being healthy!

I'm thankful for colors, for warm autumn days, rustling of leaves, chance to pamper my hubby during his cold, for my daughters and their hugs, friends that call me for advice, friends that help me pick wall colors and clean my house, for friends who share how their prayers have been answered which reminds me that God is active in our lives, for vehicles that work, a job I love, for the opportunities to love people when they most need it (even though this can be hard at times LOL), and my always faithful, loving, caring Lord.

Life at this moment...

Well I sit here coughing away enjoying the view from my front window - blue sky. I'm hoping my cold will not prevent me from cleaning out my flower beds this weekend. But it wouldn't be the first year I didn't get that done before the snow comes so no stress to me.

Off to a hair appointment this morning - so even though I may feel crappy I will look great ... hee hee.

We are in the pre renovation of the kitchen where I am strugging with what colors to pick - we have finally decided on cabinet types and locatons - I still need to choose molasses and pistachio or just molasses for the cabinet colors. It's been really hard to find a wall color that goes with molasses and pistachio and I don't know if I'm brave enough to have 2 colors in the kitchen. Do I settle for all molasses and have a dark kitchen or all cabinets in pistachio and risk getting tired of the color... I've never had a dark kitchen before so it will be really different if we do.

Either way I'm thankful that we can afford to do this major reno in our house, I'm thankful for friends advice about our kitchen, I'm thankful for a new friend that said she would help me pick out wall colors, I'm thankful for making it through this last week with my cold and still getting the amount of work done that I did, I'm thankful for the good Lord who has created a season full of beautiful colors, who loves us, cares for us, I'm thankful my daughter has found a place to live and the wonderful family that loves her and helps me as a parent know that she is in good hands in Regina, I'm thankful for my youngest daughter that I can trust with my debit card to go get clothes on her own without going crazy and then loves to share with me her purchases. I'm thankful for my wonderful husband, that has pampered me through my cold and been patience with all my whinning in the evenings. Thank you Lord!!!

Hearing through the fog:

My ability to hear these days is not always good. Both ears have that stuffed feeling and the "ringing" in my right ear constantly. It's like hearing through a wall of fog with a distracting whine on the side. Unless I concentrate I don't always heart all of what people are saying to me. If I'm in a room with any echo or other distracting sounds - I again find it difficult to hear and understand what people are saying - I might hear the sounds but I can't always make them make sense or there is a delay in that understanding. Plus with the distracting of the ringing I have a difficult time thinking of my responses or making sense of what I want to say. And it's exhausting some days when I spend the day in meetings... I just come home and want to do nothing. Some of the reason is because I don't always adhere to the diet or stay away from foods that make it worse.

Today I realized that my spiritual life is mimicingmy physical life. Because I haven't been following my "diet" (reading the word, prayers), I find it hard to hear or see God. It's like hearing his voice through the same wall of fog. When I do "hear" I'm not understanding it or I can't retain it long enough to apply it to my life I'm tired spiritually.

I've been reading a section in a book on reflecting the image of God. My thoughts have been around the fact that it is hard to be an image, reflection of God when you don't really "know" him - you don't spend time learning, listening, trying to understand so that your reflection is a closer image.

My question for myself is how do I get rid of that wall of fog? Actually I know how I just need to do it.

Well other than that - life has been good.
I'm thankful that my sister was not seriously injured in her car accident, I'm thankful that no one was hurt in my daughters car accident, I'm thankful that i still enjoy my job, I'm thankful that with my kitchen in the beginning of renos it's not driving me crazy, and I'm thankful it gave me the opportunity to purge the kitchen, I'm thankful for a God who has patience's with me and loves me through it all, I'm thankful for my daughters and what they teach me, I'm thankful that i can help friends in need like they have helped me, I'm thankful for long weekends, bubble baths and lots of books to read. I'm thankful for having a house that accommodates Munchkin parties and potluck bbq's, for babies to hold and love, for neighbours who find our dog when he escapes and brings him home. But I'm not thankful for this stupid little black fly that is bugging me while I type this LOL